round the corner

"How are you?" asked the lady in blue.
I wish I could say. I wish for a pill to kill me this instant-
My mind hymns a rhythm -"not enough"
I scribble in newspapers, searching for something yet to be found.
Jumped into a pit thinking it was a pool.

My stomach gushing me out of me, is it... anxiety?
dancing like a demon, starving.
It's exhilarating- A nector giving me scars.
"More lies or one death?"- Dead silence was a music!
I can barely trust myself to live, killing has been my hobby since I was a kid.